Lifting the Veil

Here we are. It's been well over a year, maybe closer to two years, since I started this blog. About a year and a half since I focused it on one specific area of my life: my education. I started this in my junior year of high school and now I'm a freshman at Franklin Pierce University in little Rindge, New Hampshire.
Words cannot express how much I love this place.
I've been here for three full days now. Everyone has been nothing but nice and the campus is beyond beautiful. The first night was a little rough. Lots of awkward silences and some homesickness mainly for my dogs and a bit for my parents too but I tried not too think too hard on it. I was tired and I was nervous.
The next day was great though. Free time until noon then fun and games for the rest of the day.
Today's highlight was playing hackysack even though I failed miserably and playing frisbee in front of a band that was playing in the freshman courtyard. Unbelievably fun.
I have some things left to check off put I'm pretty comfortable with getting it done. I'm so happy here and I already don't want to leave senior year.
I don't party. I guess I'm technically straight-edge in that sense. I don't smoke. I don't drink. I don't do any sort of drugs. I've seen enough of the destruction all of that can cause. I don't want a part of it. I've seen wives with young children widowed from smokers dying of lung cancer, I've watched families destroyed by alcohol and husbands always looking for their next high at any price.
I know who I am. I'm not at college to find myself. I'm at college to be myself and to better myself.
Peace, Love, and Pandas,
Maggie

4 score

I've never been the type of person who likes to admit an ending is near. I hate endings. I have four computers with unfinished stories because I hate endings that much. I always like to think something more could happen. This time, this ending, I don't get a say in.
I had my last day of high school yesterday.
I hated a lot of things about high school. I'm not a great test taker. I'm an A student but that's not achieved without lots of stress and lots of coffee. I hate typing up tedious homework that my teacher isn't even going to look at but I still put everything I have into it. I hate dealing with the administration.
But I'm going to miss my classmates. I'm not close to all of them but I know them. They feel like my comfort zone with college looming around the bend. I'm going to miss people walking down the hall with a plate of cake or brownies or cookies. I'm going to miss the sharing of food. I'm going to miss hearing them say "It's New Testament, what do you expect?" and the New Testament quality of living (duct tape is revered there).
I'm excited and a little nervous about going to Franklin Pierce in the fall but more excited than anything. I'm thrilled about being able to take classes I have interests in and to meet a world of new people.
It's been four years that have gone by slow but filled with memories and people I'll never forget. Now I'm ready to make four more new years.

Lunges in Gas Stations at Midnight

Hi again.
Long time no post.
Last week was April vacation which means among many other things: I now only have 32 days left until my last day of wearing burgundy and I promise I will never wear burgundy after that in my life. I will be glad to not have to wear a school uniform ever again. They're fine for school but I want to be a "normal person" from now on.
Over April vacation I, with ten other people, crammed into a fifteen passenger van with the back four seats removed last Sunday morning at the crack of dawn (give or take) to begin a seven hour trek down to the lovely world of central Pennsylvania. My finance class (more on that later) and I visited one of my family friends down at his college where we saw a tree randomly split down the center and fall down. We went to a coffee house open mic night they had going on. Refilled our thirty-two ounce cups three times in the cafeteria. Walked on a bridge that was partially submerged in seven feet of water and had "CAUTION DO NOT CROSS" tape at the entrance. (Please, who reads warning signs?) Then once it hit around 11:30 instead of thinking "hey, we have to leave at six tomorrow morning three of my friends" (Amanda, Elisha and Jake) and I all decided: Hey! Why not go driving around and try to find something to do in the middle of nowhere in a state we know nothing about? My mom (my parents were chaperones because my dad teaches the finance class) drove us around but because she has the worst sense of direction we ended up getting lost a few times mostly because we didn't have much of a plan in the first place and didn't bring a GPS.
We ended up at a twenty-four hour supermarket.
We purchased a bunch of food and headed back out to our big white van that besides reading "DAVE RAMSEY OR BUST" and "LIVE DEBT FREE" "DEBT FREE AND LOVIN' IT" and "DEBT'S NORMAL BE WEIRD!" on the windows was otherwise unmarked. When we returned where we were staying for the night, we started a full game of Apples to Apples since the people who had stayed already played a newly invented game: "Ghetto Scrabble" (which instead of playing the word "post" you can play "pohsttt" instead). Armed with salsa and chips we came up with similarities between Dumbledore and Classy (because "Dumbledore makes sassy classy.") and Dick Cheney and quaint. Discovered that the trump cards for Apples to Apples are: anything with old people, E.T., and Santa.
After my best friend Jessie won by a landslide, we all settled onto the floor and slept for three hours (again, give or take).
The next day we began our journey from the middle of Pennsylvania to Nashville, Tennessee where the whole purpose of our trip would take place. The drive took twelve hours. Are you counting? That means eighteen hours in the car out of two days. At this point most of us had forgotten how to walk. The first real stop was at a gas station/Dunkin' Donuts in Woodstock, Virginia. We met Margie and Elaine there. Two southern women who worked there. Margie tried to hit my dad with a towel and Elaine said she wanted something to punch herself with because the cash register was not working. Oh Virginia, the land of awkward and crazy. After a couple more stops we finally hit Tennessee. We went into a McDonald's but then Jessie saw a shop that sold Beanie Babies and so we went in there for a bit. It smelled like old cigars. Welcome to Tennessee. Jessie bought a beanie baby Walrus.
After an extra hour that we hadn't been expecting because we hadn't figured out that there would be a time change, we reached our little motel: "Fidr's Inn." It was supposed to be Fiddler's Inn but some of the letters were burnt out. Still Fidr's Inn gave us all a chance to shower up and nice beds to sleep on for the night. Before going to sleep though we went for a walk through Grand Ole Opryland. A gigantic hotel with a waterfall, night club, and about five restaurants inside. Basically a small city inside that was probably even larger than my actual city. At Amanda's suggestion that we "Live a little and have dessert before dinner." We all got gelato. Except for Mike who is too addicted to coffee (like a true New Englander) to pass up a chance at fresh non-gas station coffee. Then we headed to the Carney Fork which was a restaurant in the same plaza as our motel. Jessie and I split a Gator tail because one of our teachers always say they refuse to eat anything that could eat them. So being the type of students we are, we went directly against that. We got there around 9:45 pm and it was closing at 10 pm but fortunately other people were there too so they didn't dislike us too much.
Then around eleven almost all of us piled back into the van to see if anything was going on in this state. We figured out how to get to Nashville this time WITH the GPS even after a couple of mishaps such as coming to a complete stop at a red light and waiting for three minutes before realizing that is was a "blinking" red light (it got brighter then a little darker and we made the same mistake the next day during the daylight). After finding out where the real part of the city was we walked up and down the main street but then left because we all had a very big day in the morning.
The next day was THE day. It was the whole reason we planned this trip. It was the day we were going to meet Dave Ramsey. Yes THE Dave Ramsey of The Dave Ramsey Show.
We walked thru Nashville again trying to calm our nerves and again burn time. We arrived at Financial Peace Plaza where Dave does his show a little early so because it was past lunch six of us got back in the van to stop at Burger King down the road. Halfway through the meal a girl on the trip named Amanda got a text from one of the boys who had stayed at the plaza that said Dave had gotten there early and they were chatting with him. Because this was the whole purpose of the trip we all immediately left and got back into the van, someone even threw away their food. We almost got into an accident we were in such a hurry and then halfway back he replied, "I'm just kidding."
We met Dave, handed him a basket of presents and a little book we put together over the year. He even signed our copy of the book. :]
Then we met Rachel Ramsey Cruz. Rachel is in the movies we watch of Dave for Finance class too. She was very sweet and answered a lot of questions that we asked her.
The way back was when the real trip began. We came, we conquered and we were on our way back. A twelve hour drive without stops. What else can you do but sing songs about anything and everything you see that had to do with trip? For example one lyric was:
Poor windshield, covered in bug guts and no one to clean it, poor windshield.
The only part of another I can remember is:
LIKE A BANANAAAAAAAAA!
And then there was the famous:
If you're happy and you know it, say DAVE RAMSEY!
At the end of the singing we stopped at a gas station off the interstate called Love's. I think it was still in Virginia but I'm not sure. It was midnight and we were all kind of spaced out and hungry. We started doing lunges in the middle of the gas station while half of us either ordered food or put quarters in that machine that you try to push more quarters forward to win more quarters. Then we went outside and did more stretches. We had started doing stretches at gas stations the first time we stopped on the trip back to see who could touch their toes and who couldn't. It was at a gas station called Pilot and they had the best gas station coffee I've ever had and during that trip I had A LOT of gas station coffee. But this brought it to a whole extra level actually doing them inside the store.
We arrived at the place we were staying in Pennsylvania at six in the morning after leaving at four from Nashville. Needless to say we fell asleep on the floor immediately after rolling out our sleeping bags and dropping our pillows.
We woke up to two random ladies typing on the computers in the room and men coming in with a Coke machine saying: "hey look, people are sleeping, must be April vacation and they're having a sleepover." It was a very strange feeling to wake up to people you could barely see talking about you.
By ten a.m. we were on the road again. The rest is pretty self explanatory. We did make it back and we were groggy and felt gross but we were all home and it was good.
It was a fantastic time and this post took longer than I expected.
Peace, Love, and Gazelles,
Maggie

I've Got It.

So here's the lesson I've been learning:
Don't let go of your dreams.
It doesn't matter how ridiculous, farfetched or trivial they are, do not let them go.
Who wants to live in a world without dreams and hope? Not me.
If you let go of those dreams you will definitely not accomplish them but don't play them down. Your dreams need time and faith to develop. They aren't always instant but if you decide early on that they won't matter in the next two years of your life, why should they become important later?
Maybe it's because at this moment the whole world seems before me. College, career, life in general seems like it's just starting but I know that beyond that, I still want to hold onto all the dreams I've had as a child, today and the ones that will come in the future. That doesn't limit me to just the dreams of today I have full confidence that I can take an opportunity and it can turn into a dream I had not even dreamt of yet.
This post may be short. But it means a lot to me.
Peace, Love, and White Tigers,
Maggie

Track Records

I have an announcement but I will not be displaying it here. It is at Tales of Eiggam. Thank you.

I just want to say a few words about Japan.
My heart goes out to them. I can not imagine that level of devastation. I admire the people so much, I've learned a lot from them. The Japanese and their families around the world are in my prayers.

Thank you.

Peace, Love and Koi Fish,
Maggie

P.S. I just spelled my own name wrong three times. That is all. There isn't anymore.

Lady Luck

Everything is coming to a close.
I have my financial aid reports back from every college.
I know what A. college will give me and what B. college won't give me.
I know what A. college will accept for 6 credits and what C. college will accept for 3 credits.

I think I've made my decision.

"I think I can. I think I can. I think I can."

Apart from those great words from our dear old friend Thomas the Tank Engine, I would like to add something I've learned this past week.

"Do not let the clock rule your life."

This is so easy to let happen. Everyone follows their clock. At 6:55 I need to be in the car for school. At 7:30 I need to be at school. At 8:00 I need to be in homeroom. Before 9:30 the lunch order must go down or I won't eat today. Before 10:00 I need to have that paper submitted online for my teacher or it will be marked late even though I have the hard copy. And so on and so on.

It's easy to let time guide you. But you can't LIVE like that. You must take each moment you have and live it to the fullest. Don't let what is happening at 11:15 dictate how you feel at 6:30. Enjoy what time you have. What you feel at one moment, you are allowed to feel. But you don't have to be chained to that moment for 24 hours. Don't let anyone make you think that you have to be.



Peace, Love and Quails,
Maggie

Photography by: http://fl0urish.deviantart.com/

Hi there stranger.

I haven't posted on here in such a long time.
I guess I haven't had a lot to say.
I've been doing a lot of thinking, a lot of stressing and a lot of dreaming.
I don't know about college and you don't know how much I would like to know.
It's always in the back of my mind and there's really not much I can do about it.
I have to wait for all the lovely financial information to come in but the colleges don't seem so concerned about getting all that information to me....
I received a bit of advice from an older family friend.
She told me: Don't fear anything. Just breathe. It's all going to come together.
I keep repeating these words to myself.
I'm feeling the pressure and I don't do well under pressure that I cannot give a well educated answer to. But I tell myself that somehow it will happen and things take time every once in a while. As hard as it is for me personally to accept, I know it's true.
Love, peace, and woodpeckers,
Maggie

I've Been a Miner for a Heart of Gold.

I love Neil Young's music. Bit becoming obsessed but those things happen. And they're for good. I promise.

So I will reveal to everyone my big secret! All nine of you! And I'm thankful for each one of you so here's your reward:
I WAS ACCEPTED INTO COLLEGE!!
And not just one.
I'll post them in order of response.

1. Regent University- My dad's college.
2. Franklin Pierce University- It's right near my grandparents and aunt and uncle.
3. Massachusetts College of Liberal Arts [MCLA]- A friend of mine goes there. Cute area.
4. Emerson College- Located in Boston, which I love and thus right near my cousin.
5. Emmanuel College- Boston also.

I have more reasons to applying to these places than just those. They all have my major for one. I want to go into Public Relations. Most likely for businesses but that's not pinned down yet. It will be awhile before I decide everything.

So, I like all of the colleges. A couple more than the others. A couple were safeties but I don't want to rule anything out.

I can't decide. Everyone tells me: You'll just know! Well guess what, I don't. I don't have anything against them I just don't have one I love over every other.

Money is always a factor, of course. But when is it not?

I don't know if I should be listening to people who say it doesn't matter as long as the degree or if I should be making connections with professors in my field.

This year is a year of decisions. And I know that for better or for worse they will be my decisions. That thrills me and scares me. But I have confidence in myself and I'm grateful my parents are not pressuring one over the other. They understand that this will affect where I will be living for the next four years of MY life. This place is where I'm going to decide who I want to be as an adult. And that's exciting. I want to be somewhere I'm happiest and feel safest. And there are so many factors that come into play but I'll be fine and I'll figure it out.
I know I will. I have time to do it too.

ALSO! check out talesofeiggam.blogspot.com . My second blog! Bit more of a personal touch.

Peace, Love, and Parakeets,
Maggie

And we're back in the real world Toto.

Yep, I have officially started school again and the only thing it's done for me is make me excited for February vacation and overall college honestly.
I do not mind the work I have to do at school, I do mind the tedious talks they give that have no connection to the subject matter at hand. I want to either have the time to do the work they are assigning and have them not talking about things we already have learned for the past four years or I would rather them not assign these assignments. Period.
I have 2.5 weeks to prep for my mid-year exams. I have no idea was is supossed to be on them. And for some reason whenever any of us students ask them, they say "You don't need to worry about it." Yeah, why should we be concerned about fifty percent of our grade? We're obviously being overdramatic.

Well, because of stressful situations such as the aforementioned incidents I have devolped a nasty habit that I never knew existed: Bruxing. Bruxing, according to some site I found on google, is when you clench your jaw. Apparently, I do this. And I do it a lot. I clench my jaw when I am tired, nervous, upset, or under stress. Also, it turns out I not only do it when I am awake, I also do it when I am asleep so I wake up in the morning with severe jaw pain.
I found all this out when I thought that my wisdom teeth were coming in. No, they are not coming in which is good because I hate the idea of oral surgery. I went through a series of x-rays, including the one that spins all the way around your head and makes you wonder if they are aliens scanning your brain for information on how to take over earth, and after all that with no results to determine why I was having this pain that I was sure must be from my teeth being pushed together by intruding yet invisible wisdom teeth. I was wrong. And I'm brave enough to admit that to you.
My dentist then asked me: Are you under stress?
I answered no to this because I never really feel stressed. Normally I see a task that I must complete and I do it to my absolute best ability. After that, I forget about it. I move on with my life and fill my time with what I want to do.
The he asked: Do you grind your teeth? Or do you clench your jaw?
I said no to both because I never had thought the question before to myself. After thinking about it though, I realized I don't clench my teeth but I do seem to clench my jaw. Who does that!? Me.

Peace, Love and Pomeranians,
Maggie

A New Year

Happy New Years!
So 2011 is going to bring at least three major events.
1. In Six months and eight days I will be graduating from high school.
2. I will be entering college and living somewhere completely new regardless of where I go. I may be living in the middle of nowhere or I may be living in the middle of one of my favorite cities. But that's a bit of a difficult choice since right now I live an hour from the city so I live in a very rural area which will be a big transition.
3. And finally, I will be turning eighteen, which is just exciting in general.

It's definitely going to be a year of changes.
I'm excited but cautious and determined to remain focused on what I need to be doing.
Hopefully in the next couple weeks I can let you in on that secret.

I have mid-years coming up around the end of this month which should not be too painful.

I spent New Year's Eve at my best friend Jessie's house celebrating her birthday and eating lots of Chinese food.

Final announcement:
I started another blog, I feel like it will actually help me focus on keeping updated here.
http://talesofeiggam.blogspot.com/
Check it out if you wish.

Peace, Love and Rabbits,
Maggie